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WOMENS' FORUM: Do you use your van to take vacations from unhappy husbands
#11
(11-13-2017, 10:06 AM)jaxtonsgram Wrote: My husband is 69 and I am 59. Is it the age? My husband can be grumpy as well, and...he can have a very negative attitude  alot of the time. I know a lot of it is dealing with our business. Im hoping selling it will help. We hopefully will be traveling in a motor home (him) and a van ( me). So often we will be together but it gives us the opportunity to do things by ourselves, for example I can go to womens gatherings without him. Or I can  workamp and he can stay in his motor home. Nora

I'm 47 and dh is 50.  He's the same way.  He has always hated every job he's had and is unhappy most of the time I am with him. He also doesn't want to be a full time rver or vandweller.  On the one hand I think he would be happier getting away from it all.  On the other, I really like the idea of getting away from him for part of the time.  Currently I plan to use wherever he is as a home base, but leave when I'm feeling like I want/need to.  I went to see my friend in my van last month and was gone for 6 days.  I absolutely loved it.  He talked about how awful it was for me to be gone.  But when I am back, he still seems to think life is awful.  IDK.
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JustACarSoFar (11-16-2017)
#12
I call it taking a vacation! Had a nice one yesterday, drove around, parked, hung out in back on the bed and played with my iPad. Visited a dog rescue adoption event and saw some I liked, but hubs says two dogs are enough, but I stopped in anyway.
When I get home from my vacations he doesn't ask a lot of questions, he probably knows he's obnoxious and I need time away. Lol.
I need protein bars, water, and a taser next.
2017 Chevy Express 2500 Van, her name is Big Girl. She is no frills and much loved. Heart
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#13
(11-13-2017, 10:06 AM)jaxtonsgram Wrote: Is it the age? My husband can be grumpy as well, and...he can have a very negative attitude  alot of the time. I know a lot of it is dealing with our business. Im hoping selling it will help.

Nora, this sounds exactly like what I am going through - but my husband won't sell and he won't go for van travel. I think our days as a couple are numbered.

In answer to the OP's question, yes. I used to get away by myself as much as I could, but one day I just had to leave for good. I *should* have gotten a van but I got an apartment in another city instead; now I'm kicking myself. But the ultimate goal is to become mobile, hopefully within the year. Fingers crossed!
It's little I care what path I take,
And where it leads it's little I care,
But out of this house, lest my heart break,
I must go, and off somewhere! 
 ~ Edna St. Vincent Millay
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#14
I used all kinds of means to get away from my husband any chance I could until I left for good after 38 years. I went on trips by myself and with friends, sometimes he went with me. He didn’t like traveling and exploring as much as I did, never wanted to take beach walks, ride bikes, kayak. I found myself doing these things alone while we were traveling on a trip. He complained a lot and never seem to be happy so I decided I would be happier doing it on my own. Everything was a debate or I was questioned about my decision, I got sick of it! Now I go when I want, where I want and stay as long as I want in my van that I am constantly trying to improve. I decided to have a homebase and take shorter trips of a month or two for right now Because I have a daughter and grandkids here. I’m healing, growing, changing trying to be the real me, the person I was meant to be before I entered this dysfunctional relationship of nearly 40 years. Yeah money is tight but it’s worth it!
Explore, Dream, Discover 
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dawnann7 (12-28-2017), SilverVoyager (12-27-2017)
#15
Gotta hand it to you, Bohemian Scout. You got nerve.
..................................................
1997 Class B Dodge van 3500.
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Bohemian scout (11-23-2017)
#16
My question: WHY do you stay with these people?

This thread is why I'm happy I'm divorced and plan to stay single for the rest of my life.  And yes, when I was married for 24 years to a miserable human being I took frequent road trips to keep my sanity. As a result I've traveled all over the eastern U.S and Canada and did all sorts of cool things. My "marriage" was like 2 divorced people sharing the same space. IMO, if you stay in a relationship like this it had better be for a good reason. The reason I stayed was that I had two kids to raise and wouldn't leave them so once they were on their own I filed the papers and left that life behind. Best day of my life was the day my ex and I went our separate ways. I will never, ever give up my freedom again. I love not having to answer to or deal with anyone else!


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"And now it's your chance to move on
Change the way you've lived for so long
..'Cause life starts now"

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#17
(11-13-2017, 10:06 AM)jaxtonsgram Wrote: he's almost 70 and so grumpy he would never find another woman to marry and take care of him!

My husband is 69 and I am 59. Is it the age? My husband can be grumpy as well, and...he can have a very negative attitude  alot of the time. 

It seems that when men get older they get fat, grumpy, melodramatic and boring. Another reason I have no desire to date.
"And now it's your chance to move on
Change the way you've lived for so long
..'Cause life starts now"

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SilverVoyager (12-27-2017)
#18
Well, hubby is getting worse, so I might have to leave for a few days at a time. I have a question. If I take a drawing with measurements to Home Depot, will they cut the plywood for me? It would be to fit sideways over the wheel wells for my bed. The cut outs are to make it fit around the ribs and keep the thing in place. Would they do that for me? I think they will help me put it in the van, it will be heavy.
The support underneath, havent figured that out yet.
2017 Chevy Express 2500 Van, her name is Big Girl. She is no frills and much loved. Heart
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#19
(12-27-2017, 10:56 PM)SilverVoyager Wrote: If I take a drawing with measurements to Home Depot, will they cut the plywood for me?

They may. Some hardware stores have "cutting" areas that have helped me in the past. Give them a call. If they don't have a cutting area they can probably direct you to someone who does.
It's little I care what path I take,
And where it leads it's little I care,
But out of this house, lest my heart break,
I must go, and off somewhere! 
 ~ Edna St. Vincent Millay
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SilverVoyager (12-28-2017)
#20
All the lumber yards I've ever been in will only do straight cuts. I've never had one that would do any notching for me as they use nothing but big commercial straight saws.

A jigsaw is really easy to use for cutting out the notches. If you've never used one watch a few videos and then practice on some scraps until you're comfortable with it.

I always did layouts of the plywood so that I got maximum use out of a sheet. Multiple cuts had to be figured out in advance for the person using the saw so I figured it out myself and then dictated it cut by cut.
Worry is a misuse of imagination!
 
Build link: http://www.cheaprvliving.com/forums/Thre...g-Arabella
Full-timer again as of November 24, 2015 - 14 glorious years on the road before that!



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SilverVoyager (12-28-2017)


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