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Coping with a spouse's mid life crisis
#71
(12-14-2017, 11:59 AM)Capricci Wrote: Anyway, my first goal is to leave my shorelife completely next summer and revisit as many of the places he took me to in Colorado as I possibly can, and stop and do some of the things he woudnt let me do.

I love this! Do it.

One of my favorite quotes is, "The best revenge is a life well lived." Make your life the best it can be for YOU and it will be easier (over time) to deal with what you've lost.

Sorry this is happening to you but often we find the most catastrophic things are also the things that propel us forward.

Hugs...
It's little I care what path I take,
And where it leads it's little I care,
But out of this house, lest my heart break,
I must go, and off somewhere! 
 ~ Edna St. Vincent Millay
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Capricci (12-19-2017)
#72
Oh, I LOVE that poem!
Capricci
1. fancy, whimsy, caper
2. sudden start, motion, or change of direction
4. one old, blue minivan, destined for greatness
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Jerry1088 (12-15-2017), dawnann7 (12-15-2017)
#73
(12-14-2017, 11:59 AM)Capricci Wrote: My husband filled for divorce just last week. Im having trouble coping,

Capricci,

I'm very sorry that you and your husband couldn't work out your issues and stay together. Midlife crisis for us women is when we go through the menopause cycle and our hormones go all over the place. It makes us change who we are inside and out. Sometimes it makes us bolder in personality and at other times it causes us fears, anxiety, depression and a host of other emotions and symptoms that we cannot control due to the diminished estrogen's and loss of menses . The average age of U.S. women at the time of menopause is 51 years. The most common age range at which women experience menopause is 48-55 years. Premature menopause is defined as menopause occurring in a woman younger than 40 years.

This might explain what you are presently feeling along with the loss of your marriage and husband. Now to the other issue you said that you are 52 years old and don't have an income.  I know that with U.S. Social Security laws if your spouse is 62 years of age and is receiving a pension then you can collect half of it when you are of the same age but not sooner. So maybe if your health permits you may find a job somewhere to make an income so as to self sustain otherwise if your health does not permit and if your eligible then maybe pursue some sort of disability benefits to help you get by. I don't know what the requirements are so i cannot go into detail. I hope your situation improves and i wish you all the best in the future.
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Capricci (12-19-2017), Cammalu (12-14-2017)
#74
I can’t even begin to guess at what your marriage was like or what any kind of fair mediation would be. But I am sure there should be one. Nearly every state encourages mediation at divorce instead of fighting and the courts, I’d encourage you to look into that. If you can both go in with a desire to be fair, it doesn’t have to be a war or a win-lose. Perhaps in the long run you can one day both see it as a mutual win.

Iv’e shared a camp with your ex, and you are always welcome in mine as well!
2015 GMC Savannah 2500 van, 480 watts of Solar Panels--and a wonderful furry best friend named Cody. I'm out to change the world!
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Capricci (12-19-2017)
#75
Please tell him he won.
Capricci
1. fancy, whimsy, caper
2. sudden start, motion, or change of direction
4. one old, blue minivan, destined for greatness
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#76
Imean... His money is safe. He is safe. His new love is safe. I will never have my dream of meeting Bob, or any of you. It's hard to accept, but Curt has taken literally everyone from me, and i can't win. And im not like him. I really can't hurt him. Thank you for your kindness. Good bye.
Capricci
1. fancy, whimsy, caper
2. sudden start, motion, or change of direction
4. one old, blue minivan, destined for greatness
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#77
I think my wife is going to one to she up and left me for another guy that she meant to days prior before she left me totally completely out of the blue through away a 20 year marriage of traveling going and seeing things we had a good time we had a good friendship for her to do what she did blows my mind I could take her to court to the divorce and have gotten alimony and have gotten withholding it in infection lawsuit against the guy that she left with because we were still legally married at the time. And even though I don't make enough money to survive anywhere else besides my car it was still were just cutting the strings and moving on sorry this happened to you I know it devastated me when it happened to me

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Capricci (12-15-2017)


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